Trust Me, Ahmad!
You can tell a lot about people by seeing how they treat their friends.
Take Bill Clinton for example. He was a "people person" and he felt our pain. But he was blatantly and continually dishonest with his closest political allies and friends, and this made him contemptible.
Honor and integrity have always been rare commodities.
Consider our best friend in any post-Saddam scenario -- Ahmad Chalabi, president of the Iraqi National Congress, Iraqi freedom fighter, liberator of Mesopotamia, verified lover of truth, justice and the American way.
We like him, we really like him! The National Review gushes, so does the American Enterprise Institute. The E-Ring loves him, and Dick Cheney does too. The Defense Policy Group, with Perle and Jim Woolsey (who left the CIA to promote the neo-con war agenda full-time) is proud to have dear Ahmad on the team.
In spite of the INC's origins as a CIA front organization and Chalabi's lack of political experience prior to this U.S. funded opportunity, the INC and Chalabi have a credibility lock on the neo-conservative wing of the Republican Party. We are close and trusting friends.
Even me! I'm back in right field. I've found my religion and it's Sunni-side up! Oops wait - Chalabi is a Shia! Oh well, it doesn't matter, because we are friends.
Chalabi is happy to discuss the good life in Iraq under his rule, a democracy of course, and his INC will definitely get the Sunni, Kurd and Shia vote. "Why not?" we tell him warmly and with real feeling, "Your platform is magnificent!" and "We love you, man!"
On liberty and freedom, a few months ago Chalabi said, ""Should we succeed… we would look to Israel as a partner in a new political, security, and commercial alliance."
Now for Arabs and Muslims, Israel is without a doubt the ideal political and economic partner. Israel's U.S.-subsidized militaristic socialism is a shining model of liberty and economic opportunity for all. Just ask the neighbors!
On justice, Chalabi said just yesterday of post-Saddam Iraq, ""We want to demonstrate that we're complying with international law and not killing people randomly."
Justice good! Killing people randomly bad! Unless it is unavoidable collateral damage, bad intelligence, misaligned targeting systems, or just plain convenient because we're stronger.
And the INC is strong! A few days ago Pentagon spokesperson Torie Clarke answered a question about when training for the Iraqi opposition was going to start. "I think it is still very much in the planning and logistical phase. Sort of potential trainers figuring out what exactly it is they'd be training. So we don't have a date."
Look, we've only been supporting the INC in our shared goal to overthrow Saddam for ten years. Training so soon? These things take time.
Maybe Bush and the neo-cons are trying to exceed the standard set by the master obfuscator. Maybe Clinton's ghost of alternative agendas and smiling lies haunts the polished old hallways in the five-sided asylum.
Ahmad, my friend, trust me. I feel your pain.